Dr. Jordan's Blog

Creating Your Own Love-Life 101

So much of the world distracts us that most people forget or worse never remember how powerful their consciousness actually is. It might have passed before your eyes a million times in a million different guises...what you expect is what you get. Let's consider this a law. So if you don't pay critical attention to what you believe there is a good chance that something else other than you personal choice will be driving your life.

Apply this to your love-life. Are there beliefs in the way of getting what you truly want and need? Life can be full of spontaneity and surprise. If you are afraid, you will trance yourself into believing this is not so. Once you get your love-life into predictable patterns that feel controllable and safe, you know that life is draining out of your LOVE-life. Do something different.

Free Love-Life Clinic

An old friend once said to me that New York City needs a free, or not so free given expenses, Love-Life Clinic. She thought people off the street could benefit from love-life advise, no commitments, just sound love-life advise and guidance. Since it is entirely possible to make the same mistakes over and over again, I can see how valuable her idea might be. Imagine a Macy's superstore with all the information you might need to fix every kind of love-life problem. Why is such an idea so ridiculous? Check the newspapers out or listen to the radio news if you don't believe that love-life problems are the number one reason people go crazy. Most of the time murders take place between familiar people. And oh yes there is that manslaughter situation where one man messes with another man's woman or another woman's man. It goes all back to your love-life. Nevertheless, it is the least talked about part of our lives as far as learning something new goes. Maybe its pride. We all want to believe we got right the first time growing up. No need to change anything about how I conduct my love-life, right? Wrong. A little bit of humility goes a long way here. Human being need to keep growing. Love-lives need to keep growing. Don't be so naive as to think you got it right for all time when you were 19 years old. The best thing about being human is our capacity to evolve, repair, improve, change. Because of this everybody's special.

Prepare For A Love-Life

After you've been married awhile you realize that your spouse knows when you are not being yourself. Certainly a valuable piece of information worth using to progress your love-life. Problem is, many people don't think of their love-lives dynamically as something living that needs information to keep growing. Filled with 'e-motion' our love-lives are moving (motion) and require the personalized information necessary to keep them from getting stuck. Listening to what Victoria (my wife) has to say about me without getting defensive is the task. So easy to feel like I know it all. So easy to justify not being vulnerable and open. Life is too short to waste being defensive and afraid. Best thing to do is to get it in my head that I better keep working on my love-life, what better goal to have in a life. If you make fun of this you are freaked out about living open. Sort of like a psych test for defensiveness. You are probably wasting your energy taking me apart rather than facing your fear. We'll keep talking about this until you feel ready.

Questions? Comments?